Friday fiction #4

There was a shiver in the air, and the first sprinkle of red edged the leaves in the valley, but she noticed neither. She saw only the trees of home: the unbroken canopy of foliage that masked the village from sight, somewhere down below.

They were not expecting her, but she would come. She would come and she would live among them as a stranger; the people she had once called friends, family even. They would hide her without knowing they were doing so, love her without knowing who they loved. And she would be safe and home, at last.


Filed under Friday Fiction, Writing

10 responses to “Friday fiction #4

  1. Oooh, intriguing and vaguely creepy. I want to know more!

  2. Russell

    Mysterious, yet peaceful and calm. Nice job.

  3. Madison Woods

    I liked that. If this were an opening to a story or novel I’d read on just to understand and know more about this character. Good job 🙂 Thanks for participating this week again! I was afraid we’d lose momentum taking a week off, but it looks like everyone was well rested and ready to go!

    • Actually, Madison, as i’m not in the US I didn’t take the week off. Last Friday i wrote something for an old photo prompt (although oddly I managed to schedule the posting so I think it’s dated for Saturday). Take a look at Friday fiction #3 if you’re interested.

  4. Thanks for the comments! It was a strange one, becuase I thought I knew where it was going in the first paragraph and then the character sprung the mystery on me in the second! I’m as intrigued as you all!

  5. Jackie and Ivan

    Fantastic writing – very intense and real making us want to read on………!Well done Jen we both enjoyed your writing.

  6. That is lovely – a lovely little story, and I think it goes well with mine. All those leaves, all those trees, they can hide so much…

  7. Now that makes me want to read more. Who is she hiding from? Why won’t the people know her. Very interesting cliffhanger…

  8. this is very intriguing, it has left me hanging for a little more…

  9. Dear Elmo,

    Awake and rested, I returned to your story and can now say that I found it to be, above all, peaceful. We know the reasons for her return and the mystery about why she left will be revealed and what we are left with is your character’s feeling on the ridge at the moment of homecoming. Very nice.



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