Friday Fiction – Sparks Fly

A brief intro this week – I think I may have mistaken the picture (courtesy of long-term fictioneer, fascinating writer and kind critiquer, Marie Gail Stratford) when viewing it on the small screen of the phone, but as Rochelle says, it’s what you see not what you look at. Enjoy! I welcome your feedback.

crystals

Sparks Fly

In the early days, sparks flew – when they touched, even when he smiled – and she knew it was love. As the years went on, different sparks kindled a different temper – muddy boots on the carpet and that bulb in the bathroom he never changed.

Then an old flame flared out of the darkness and the fire blazed in her heart once more, but she couldn’t help feeling this was a fire that would burn and scar. So she turned from its brightness and whispered gentle breaths on the fading embers of marriage, praying sparks would burst again from the hearth.

52 Comments

Filed under Friday Fiction, Writing

52 responses to “Friday Fiction – Sparks Fly

  1. A whole trajectory of a marriage in a mere 100 words. These stories collectively and individually amaze me!
    I hope he has the grace and good sense to respond…

  2. Seriously, this brought tears to my eyes. Beautiful story, Jen.

  3. Great stuff, Jen.

    As it turns out, I actually took this photo to send to my wife while I was on a trip to Houston without her this past summer. She spent her week alone catching up on Game of Thrones, and the mineral/rock thingy in the photo reminded me of the Iron Throne. Actually, I never got the shot I was going for, but it seems to be sparking some great stories this week–with a lot of variety.

    As to your story, I enjoyed the sparks as they flew.

    All my best,
    Marie Gail

    • When I looked on a bigger screen, I got the impression the sparks were a figment of my imagination, so I’m glad the love story element is more true-to-life. I hope though that you and your wife don’t need too many whispering breaths to keep the embers glowing!

      • Not these days, and I doubt that we ever will. This is a first marriage for both of us but we were 38 when we married. There’s something about waiting until middle age that makes the sparks quite different. They are still there, but they tend to burn low and slow instead of hot and fast.

  4. a fire that would burn and scar – luckily she saw that before it was too late. Wonderful trajectory of a marriage.

  5. Lyn

    Wonderful take on the prompt, Jen. I love the twist at the end.

  6. bykimberlylynne

    Rich stuff. So many meanings to the word “temper.” Happy for her she tempered her feelings for the old flame. I hope they work it out.

  7. Very beautiful! Lovely sentiment. I hope many people listen to this message.

  8. Dear Jen, I love your story and I think that with years passing the sparks morph into something even more beautiful. Very touching! Nan 🙂

  9. Dear Jennifer,

    Close enough to the photo for me. 😉 Keeping those embers from going out sometimes takes work. You’ve penned the perfect descriptions of marriage and temptation. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  10. gahlearner

    I can’t find anything to criticise. I love how the theme of sparks and flames holds the story together. As long as there are live embers under the ashes, a gentle breath can bring the flame back.

  11. Jen, I saw the photo very differently when I wrote my story and then later, saw it differently. But that’s fine. I loved what you did with what you saw! “Temptation comes to us all, I suspect; the trick is not to avoid it altogether, but to see it for the false idol it is.” This is so true and just as good as the story. Even a banked fire provides warmth.

    janet

  12. Funnily enough, I didn’t see a lump of crystal either, but a fire with metallic sparks. Nicely written.

  13. I’ve been there! You summed it up just perfectly.

  14. i wonder if anybody can say it any better in 100 words. certainly, you have the gift.

  15. I love how you managed to twist it so well back and away and then back again with that spark of imagination.. I really saw it as sparks as well (but I focused on the Exxon sign)

  16. I really enjoyed reading this. I love the way you manage to describe the whole course of their marriage in the 100 word limit. Beautifully written. 🙂

  17. That was excellent and yes, what afairymind said. I absolutely loved the ending. (Trying to rekindle the romance of her marriage).

  18. Michael B. Fishman

    This was a beautiful story, Jennifer, and a wonderful example of what a 100-word micro flash story can (and should?) be. Unfortunately, it made me feel sad, but that’s OK because it also made me smile because I was thinking just this morning that I really need to change the lightbulb in the bathroom…

  19. Dee

    I think you have captured the story of many relationships with this well written piece, Jen.
    It’s funny how we all saw different images, I focussed on the bright lights.

    • That’s one of my favourite things about these prompts – same picture, a hundred different details or interpretations. As for relationships, they are hard to build and easy to break, likeso many fo the best things in life.

  20. very soft, poetic, the words tender and soft like breath on the page. Sparks need to be rekindled all the time. Hopefully the kindling will catch… Randy

  21. You were closer than I was. You saw sparks and I saw blood. It’s seems like everyone felt some energy from this photo.

  22. This was fantastic! Above all, I love that she turned away from the infidelity and worked on fixing her marriage. I hope all turns out well for her.

  23. I love how you’ve used the fire images here. Very effective.

  24. A beautiful story, Jenn. I like the circle effect of this romance and rekindling the spark. Like they say, “The grass may look greener on the other side of the fence, but you still have to mow it.”

    • Someone should turn that phrase into a billboard and advertise it profusely, Russell – so true and not just in terms of relationships either. Thank you for your kind words and the wisdom too!

Feedback feeds the muse. Join in the conversation here:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s