Daily Archives: January 28, 2016

FF – In haste…

Picture from ceayr. Extroduction follows but is entirely optional. Either way, your comments and critique, as ever, are welcome.

chateau-de-sable-ceayr

Three weeks in, Gerald proposed. “Why wait?” he said, “You’re the one for me.”

When Lea told her family, mostly nobody objected. “She’ll do it anyway,” she heard Mum whisper to Dad that night. “We’ll only push her away if we say anything.”

“He’s a nice boy and she seems happy,” Dad replied. “Why wait, I suppose.”

She took Gerald with her to the nursing home.

“He’s easily confused,” she warned. “He might muddle up who we are.”

But that day Grandpa was clear as a bell. “Why hurry?” he said, gently. “In my day, you built foundations before walls.”

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Extroduction

In haste is the title of this post as well as the story. As ever, I seem to be limited for time today. This story is exactly100 words, but otherwise didn’t get the level of polish I’d like. Here are a couple of thoughts. Feel free to read and answer them if you wish. Or not.

I don’t really like the name Gerald for this character. It feels a bit old-fashioned next to Lea and I’m wondering if that might distract a reader.

I had a version of this story told later, and making clear whether lea took the advice and how she felt about it later. However, I quite like the symmetry of Gerald and grandpa’s comments framing the story, so I decided to leave the results to your imagination.

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