FF – Building up

Rochelle Wisoff-Fields‘ own photo today.

Building Up

As we climbed, I sensed something was about to happen. We always said we wouldn’t get married, that love was enough. But that day it occurred to me that an ancient temple, high above the city, would be the perfect place for you to propose. When you touched your pocket, I wondered what sort of ring you’d hidden there. By the time we reached the top, my heart was pounding as much from the anticipation as from the climb.

Then you pulled out your phone and as you snapped selfies, my heart was tumbling 7000 steps back down to reality.

27 Comments

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27 responses to “FF – Building up

  1. Better a phone than a revolver! I feel sorry that her hopes were dashed on the rocks. Good story, Elmo.

  2. If he only used the phone for selfies and photos of the two of them, he deserves to be pushed down those 7000 steps…

  3. It might have been a good idea for her to have given him some clue about the direction she was thinking

  4. What a let down! But I’m glad it was just a phone and not something more sinister!

  5. Reality—nobody likes it. Clever story.

  6. Well written! And, yes, perhaps it is better that the heart tumbled then, rather than later …

  7. I think it may be time she made him history. He sounds like a ruin of a potential husband. Good one.

  8. many a heart broken by hoping for that which does not happen. Well done.

  9. I have to be honest, I also thought it might end with someone getting pushed from the top! But I like your ending much better 🙂

  10. GOSH … what a bummer???!!! Then again, she brought it upon herself. She can’t say one thing and hope for another. She’s confusing the guy. I’m glad either one didn’t accidentally push the other off of the cliff. I like this story. There’s so much more that can be written. More please …
    Isadora 😎

    • Wow, I’m not sure how much more I have of this one. I think maybe she’s just idly dreaming and will be happy back in reality tomorrow. But if not, she’d better let him know.

  11. Dear Jen,

    Aw shucks. What a letdown. Great buildup though. It would’ve been the perfect place to propose. Good job.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  12. When a dream goes beyond, ‘love that is enough’. the anticipation is well done, I had to ask what was the indication she had that he might propose? Clearly he was in a different world.

    • Maybe nothing, maybe a chance comment, or watching a romantic movie, or recent news from a friend – who knows what makes something pop into our heads, bidden or otherwise

  13. Poor girl. She needs to discover the kind of location that triggers romantic thoughts in his head and take him there. Great ending. I like how you used the falling metaphor to show her disappointment.

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